


would you be my lover

by tetsuwu



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Haikyuu chapter 335, I Made Myself Cry, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Same-Sex Marriage, if japan passes same-sex marriage we'd all be seeing our faves married
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-12
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2020-03-01 11:44:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18799684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tetsuwu/pseuds/tetsuwu
Summary: Bokuto enthusiastically grabs Akaashi’s hand, tugging the younger man to walk faster. The road continues ahead to a steep curve lined with houses and trees and poles, no cars in sight. Bokuto knows this place like the back of his hand, remembers the dents and undulations one can only learn after running and panting and walking along, and then running some more. He can walk blindfolded and still point the spot where he first tripped because the laces of his left shoe came undone. Or the spot where he realised his clubmates left him running alone despite the remaining three laps and cool down.It didn’t anger him. Rather, it ushered a sobering realisation that a company can be easy to find but harder to keep. But he was optimistic, still is. And years later, he found the company worth-keeping and worth-trudging the steep slope up and over again.So he returns to this place. First, with the team that was moulded by his sheer energy and passion. Second, with the man he’s clasping hands with. The highs and lows of his moods may not compare to the peaks and dips of the road they’re travelling ahead. But this road has been his witness. He implores it to be, once more.





	would you be my lover

**Author's Note:**

> this is what happens when you listen to Kishi Bashi's "m'Lover" (title reference) for hours straight. like, can you imagine, if Japan passes a law legalizing same-sex marriage, we'd all be seeing a flood of art on our favorite ships in wedding attire... glory be
> 
> song link: https://open.spotify.com/track/3f6BsKWTaPRyQNtM2jddNv?si=pP3vhN8ZQJmLypYoKWDuIQ

Late afternoons in December are cold and filled with colors of autumn that flail against the impending dreary of winter. Akaashi huddles beside Bokuto, relishing the warmth of the man and the brightness he offers amidst the gloom. They walk in pursuit of the vanishing sunlight towards a destination only the older man knows. Apart from the muted thrumming of cars and the growing cinders of downtown city lights, only Bokuto’s whistling fills in the gaps between their breaths and steps.

 

“I remember you telling me your grandfather taught you how to whistle in order to call the wind, but since it’s December, I think calling the wind is out of the question, Bokuto-san”. Akaashi arranges his scarf and squeezes his hands shut in the pockets of his jacket. He feels crumpled paper and realizes it is Bokuto’s jacket he’s wearing.

 

“Ah it’s a habit, you know! A habit!” Bokuto flails his gloveless hands.

 

“Ah I see. It’s getting darker though, mind if we return?” Akaashi rubs his gloved hands, breathing out big. December isn’t that cold yet to render exhaled air a thick white puff.

 

“There’s still some light. Don’t worry Akaashi! I know this place!”

 

Bokuto enthusiastically grabs Akaashi’s hand, tugging the younger man to walk faster. The road continues ahead to a steep curve lined with houses and trees and poles, no cars in sight. Bokuto knows this place like the back of his hand, remembers the dents and undulations one can only learn after running and panting and walking along, and then running some more. He can walk blindfolded and still point the spot where he first tripped because the laces of his left shoe came undone. Or the spot where he realised his clubmates left him running alone despite the remaining three laps and cool down.

 

It didn’t anger him. Rather, it ushered a sobering realisation that a company can be easy to find but harder to keep. But he was optimistic, still is. And years later, he found the company worth-keeping and worth-trudging the steep slope up and over again.

 

So he returns to this place. First, with the team that was moulded by his sheer energy and passion. Second, with the man he’s clasping hands with. The highs and lows of his moods may not compare to the peaks and dips of the road they’re travelling ahead. But this road has been his witness. He implores it to be, once more.

 

They arrive at that point where the horizon meets the tip of the road. Below, the cinders of city lights flare in spite of the remnants of the retreating sun. Bokuto holds Akaashi’s hands firmly, he feels past the soft texture of the glove and gently caresses the knuckles that have supported him through the dullest and sharpest days of his life. The hands that have reach out to him, unwavering, even when all he wanted was to find cover beneath the dirt and soil. Bokuto wouldn’t have enthralled the whole world of his zest and passion on court, if not for the strength hidden underneath all the skin and bones and ligaments of these hands.

 

 

Now, all he ever wishes is to pronounce his zest and passion towards the man by his side. He releases the hands to feel the velvet hidden in his pocket.

 

“Akaaashi. We’ve been like, together, for many years now…”

 

“I know that Bokuto-san, I was with you”. A playful smile graces Akaashi’s face.

 

“Hahaha you really crack me up! And people thought I was the one who’s the clown in this relationship!”

 

“I’m not really the clown. You’re just easy to laugh… with”, Akaashi’s smile hints fondness and nostalgia. Bokuto’s glee measures the same.

 

“Anyway, as I was saying, we’ve been together for many years now. I know things are still complicated, and we still can’t actually, legally, be together, but I hope this gesture seals the deal”. Bokuto kneels on his stronger knee and pulls out the velvet from his pocket. “You’re the most amazing person I’ve ever been with. Not that I’ve ever been with any other person really. Oh wait, I think teammates and parents do count, but still, I think you’re better than all of them. Hmmm, my parents are on a different level though…” Akaashi’s eyes widen as Bokuto rambles on about how he needs to rethink how amazing people around him are. Or that they’re amazing because they’re around him. The rambling doesn’t matter, since he also bent his knee to meet Bokuto’s lips. The kiss is full of reverence and promise of warmth in mornings and comfort at nights, a sense of familiar and excitement for what lies ahead.

 

Kissing Akaashi has been Bokuto’s greatest honor, parallel to the rush when an extremely good spike powers through an equally formidable block. Kissing Akaashi now generates no rush, rather, an undercurrent that carefully tucks and rolls the waves towards the shore. Kissing Akaashi then is sparkful of desire. Kissing Akaashi now is sailing home.

 

They part their lips. Bokuto’s eyes shine through unshed tears of indecision, back when he was still choosing which ring would best signify his affection. Kuroo was of no help, really; it was Tsukishima who nudged him towards choosing a platinum-silver thin band. They had the underside engraved with their birthdates and team jersey numbers.

 

“You know you didn’t have to. But I really appreciate the gesture”.

 

The band fits snugly on Akaashi’s ring finger. “I know how much you’ve been working hard to make us, well, legal. I just want you to know how much it means to me, how much you mean to me. Even if it doesn’t come to be, I am here to stay. We are our own home”. Bokuto kisses the ring then proceeds to kiss each and every knuckle and finger of Akaashi’s hand.

 

“Bokuto-san, I know it’s also hard for you. And you put a lot of things on the line for me as well, even your career. Perhaps I am the luckiest person alive to have a person like you”.

 

Akaashi hugs his partner, his man, tight. Tears did not shy away from falling, even as the cold breeze envelopes his face. “Please wait. We’ll try harder even more”, Akaashi whispers a promise that he intends to keep for a lifetime.

 

“Having you here is the best thing in the world. I know you won’t stop. So I’m here to support you. If you decide to pause, or to just leave everything and settle elsewhere, I’ll gladly come with you. I’m just happy to walk alongside your journey, Akaashi”.

 

Bokuto kisses Akaashi once more. One on the corners of his eye, one on side of cheek, one on the corner of his lips. “And if we become legal, I’ll be the one to propose to you for marriage”, Akaashi chuckles as he closes his eyes, the warmth of Bokuto’s cheeks on his fingers while pressing their noses together.

 

 

 

 

\-------

_60 years later_

 

“I think that night when I said I’m going to live til 130, someone out there heard me and made it come true”, Bokuto mutters as he heard the approaching clickity clack of steps and cane.

 

“Come on Bokuto! We’re gonna be late. YOU’RE gonna be late!”, Kuroo shouts despite being almost an arm’s length away from his friend. It’s been years since he last strained his body, and the uphill road they traveled made him feel he’s really aged to the bones. He shivers at the thought of climbing it up on foot. He thanks whoever made cars possible.

 

Bokuto shifts his gaze towards his old friends. Just behind Kuroo, Tsukishima follows, scanning the vista offered by the elevation. “I didn’t expect you’d still be able to, er, climb this”.

 

“This road is my friend. It knows me well”.

 

“Come on, man”, Kuroo pats his shoulder and gently nudges Bokuto towards the car. “Wouldn’t want the groom to be late on his wedding day”.

 

“More like the wedding was late on our wedding day. Hahaha!” Bokuto’s laughter remains full of life, despite the sunset years impressing on his body.

 

“Even if it’s just the four of us, I’m sure Akaashi-san wouldn’t be amused to hear that”, Tsukishima warned. He opened the car door to let Bokuto in. As their car find its way careening down the path, Bokuto looks through the window and permits to relieve the night when he adorned Akaashi’s finger with a ring. It may have been decades ago, but the warmth and sensation of Akaashi’s embrace as he promised they would try even harder resounded clearly in his ears.

.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

.

Serenity greets their car as they arrived. They walk towards the clearing where Akaashi awaits. A lump in Bokuto’s throat forms, his eyes painful of the impending rush of tears he wishes not to fall. It’s a happy day for both of them, a celebration of their lifetimes, so he wills them to dissipate. Although the people around him knows he wears his big heart on his sleeve, he still wills them to dissipate.

 

“Akaashi, I know you promised you’d ask my hand for marriage once it’s all good. I’m sorry you couldn’t wait for it. As I’ve said earlier to Kuroo, this wedding is late on our day. Maybe a little too late in general. But we’re here. I’m here. We can still fulfil the promise”.

 

He fishes out the ring in his pocket and carefully feels the ridges and edge. Bokuto bites his lip in an attempt to distract his senses from the chockfull of tears he’s keeping at bay.

 

But his tears revolted past through. It runs as he washes the stone and lays down the flowers. He envies the ground beneath that soundly keeps his love. He lights the incense as soon as he hears shuffling and sniffing from the couple behind.

 

“By the way Akaashi, I know we never really talked about it, but I’m taking your name. Tsukki helped with the paper work”. He chuckles as he imagines Akaashi’s surprised countenance at the idea of calling him Mr. Akaashi Koutarou.

 

 

They leave for home after a few minutes. Bokuto’s bad knee warns them of the rain that would not fall until after a few hours. The couple drops him off in front of his and Akaashi’s abode, holds the velvet box as firmly equivalent as he held Akaashi all throughout their lived years together. There’s no hint of regret nor frustration at how their circumstances played. He could’ve been carrying Akaashi to their home, could’ve been opening their door and entering in for the first time as a married couple. But the _could've been_ s exist in a different plane. Now, all he has are good memories and a velvet box with the ring which he places carefully at the altar.

 

He still wants to live til 130 if he’s lucky, able to live a long life for both of them.

**Author's Note:**

> THEIR. LIVES. ARE. WELL. LIVED.


End file.
